Transgenger Vet Voice

Dear White People,

I understand how much you are called to move this country forward with social justice actions and community involvement.  You uniquely probe into other races/cultures that are perceived as having less opportunity or less empathy and are able to superficially see the justification in your acts of altruism (to fight the just fight).  I’ll raise a hand to pat you on the back for that; thank you.  For sure, you have the energy and are willing to learn.  I have never felt more alone.  I looked to you, the social liberals, the progressives, the peacekeepers, the media, and the outspoken activists for change.  After each conversation with you I was more alone.  I do not fit into your box of progressive social movement diversity.  I am white.  I am transgender.  I am a veteran.  I am nothing special.  I’m an american.  I turned to my church, but I was not brown enough.  I turned to my legislative representatives, but I was not liberal enough.  I turned to the LGBT community, but I was not gay enough.   I still have my voice even if no one is listening.  I will still fight. Please consider the next time you meet someone like me, don’t be afraid, and don’t immediately dismiss it.

Best Always,


25 thoughts on “Transgenger Vet Voice

  1. Reblogged this on By Hook Or By Book and commented:
    In light of Mr. Trump officially putting his ban on transgenders in the military into action, Chris’s post is even more heartbreaking.


  2. For what it’s worth Chris, I’m listening. I hope you don’t mind the reblog. What you wrote brought tears to my eyes and I thought it was important to share.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Kim, I don’t mind you sharing this at all. I had a close friend read my blog yesterday and she felt like I sounded angry although it was not my initial intention. I just wanted to be honest about my frustration and get it out of my head so I could work it through more productively. I still don’t know what the answer is, I’m still looking for a place to belong and I decided to blog about to possibly build some relationships with people who can help me change that. Thanks!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Chris, I don’t think you sounded angry at at all. Perhaps frustrated and hurt, which is perfectly understandable. I think it’s despicable what you’ve gone through.

        Liked by 2 people

  3. Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
    Dear Chris … I’m a proud and out member of the LGBTQ community. I see you, I accept you, I embrace you! I worked with the VA for many years. I would gladly accept you as my patient … ❤️ I won’t turn away!! 🏳️‍🌈

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey Dr. Rex, I appreciate your response and honestly, my experience with the VA has been a nightmare. I would love for you to prove me wrong. I’m going to sound like an ass, but I feel that you are located on the West Coast. It seems the VA healthcare system there is slightly more evolved than New Jersey. Please prove me wrong.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. My dear new friend … I’m in Florida. I’m originally from Puerto Rico. I retired 4 years ago. My experience with patients was real, honest and warm for the most part. Dealing with the ‘system’ was and is s pain.
        The red tape is always exasperating. Please feel free to ask any questions to see if I can help or guide you … 🙏🏽


      2. I think I may try to give them another chance. I’ve heard there are LGBT support groups and other resources available to transgender vets through the VA. Believe me, I’m not trying to take advantage of the system but it seems like it may not be available to us for much longer.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. NEVER, NEVER ever say or even think that you are taking advantage of the system!! I had plenty veterans who felt like this and I always told them … you were in a war, you came out of one .. now you start a new one. This one is for you, not ‘them’!! The system was put in place to help you and others like you. It doesn’t matter what medical needs any veteran may have. That’s the job of the VA … you will find that the guys/gals in the ‘trenches’ (like me) do care deeply about what we are/were doing. My loyalty is and will always be with the vet. That is what my mission was … Always remember, that the squeaky wheel gets the oil and that you get things done easier with honey than vinegar.
        That was my ‘mantra’ for all of those who came into my office.
        Be nice, be calm but be assertive! I can’t tell you how things are now or how they may change with the new ‘so-called Commander-in-Chief … I really don’t think things will get any better but that’s another story …
        Always be proud of your service but most importantly be proud of who you are. Be loyal to yourself. This time now is yours.
        BTW, I’ve started following you blog … I’d like to stay in touch to see how you are doing and feeling … even retired, I think about folks like you … twofold reason: I worked for the VA for almost 28 years and, like I told you. I’m a member of the LGBTQ community … I’m a lesbian in FL who managed to marry the love of my life.
        Now, we more than likely, will have to fight for that too!!
        We have to stick together … we have to continue our personal fight. Again … I AM with you!! Peace …. __/l\__ …. ❤


  4. Never ever consider yourself “nothing special”. I don’t know you, heck I am not even an American but reading your post… yeah, I would say you are something special. I can’t possibly start to understand your situation but I can see how someone in your situation feels kind of … “not belonging” I have had a similar situation when I was homeless (been for 15 years) First I was not young enough, then not old enough, not addicted, not criminal *yeah I know, that are good things.. apparently not when you are homeless and need help) not belonging to a focus group enough etc etc. I got lucky and managed to get out of my situation and my loneliness. I can only hope and wish (or pray if you like) that you will meet the same and will find your place and esteem (I hope I say that right)
    I wish you much love and strength from the Netherlands


    Liked by 3 people

    1. Hey Mavadelo, I agree with you and I feel the same. I’m stuck in some kind of life void where people are moving and changing all around me yet I’m just here. I think sometimes it is easier for people to see the physical suffering but not understand there is more to the human experience when we reach out for help. I feel lucky too, I’ve managed to stay in the game. I wish you love back from the US. and really appreciate you reaching out to me.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. You are most welcome … yes indeed. It works. That’s how I start 4 years ago, after my retirement. Know that you are NOT alone … hugs!! Peace … __/l\__ … ❤


    1. Thank you, I really appreciate the encouragement. I want to communicate to the world about being transgender. There are so many ignorant people out there, especially when it comes to the transgender veteran community, who are just not informed enough to question the common belief that we are different or less than capable of. Thanks again.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I really hope more people will start to open their minds and their hearts to see what you, and many, many others, are trying to communicate! I know I can never 100% understand because it is not a struggle I have had to fight for, but I can give my full support and love! ❤

        Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for your service. I am sure you have not heard that enough!

        Liked by 2 people

    1. Yeah, it’s kind of ironic, if that’s the right word, but I have so many LGB friends who I thought would understand what transgender is but am finding that I need to have information conversations with them just as often as with those in the non-LGBT community.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s