Why Now?

Hi I’m Chris.  I’m starting this blog to connect with people in the LGBT family and allies.  As of June 30th 2017 I came out transgender with the intent on transitioning ftm in the near future.  This life changing decision almost now seems commonplace for me, due to the medias transgender bathroom coverage, state and national policy changes, and tweets from our current president.  I was lucky and found out who my supporters were early on.  I was a bit taken back by my total unpreparedness in regards to predicting who would stand & support me and who would fall out of my life.  I thought I knew how this would play out but I will be the first to admit that I was sorely wrong.

For me, going into my late 30’s, “coming out” has allowed me the freedom and happiness that I  never dared to dream, but it also has carried along some unforeseen social challenges.  I do live in a community, I work, have friends, go out on the weekends, even go on vacation once or twice a year.   I give my friends so much credit for seeing how hard they are trying to adjust to the new me, using my new name and stopping themselves from the wrong pronoun.  I have heard the words brave and courageous thrown around, they only felt good for the first day or two of my outness, now just seem cliche because there is so much work that needs to be done to dispel ignorance towards transgender people in the popular culture.  I’ve had people in response to my “coming out”, come out to me.  I’ve had others tell me very personal experiences on their sexuality (both gay and straight)  I have somewhat become a sounding board for “good for you to speak out, now here is what I am going through (could be similar to you)”  It’s not, this is who I am.  It was all a facade up until now.  I never wanted to rock society’s boat; never wanted to make those waves.   I never wanted to be at the center of attention.  I never wanted to be a pioneer.  I never wanted to be a leader.  I never wanted to be an advocate.  I never wanted to be different.

If you want to contact me you are more than welcome to message me here or on Facebook.

Best,

Chris Budin

One thought on “Why Now?

  1. Hey Chris, So Im 53 and this has been my pivotable year. Im married (25 years + 7 dating), she always knew I wore womens clothing, but not the consequence. My two daughters are in and about to be in college so I started thinking about myself! cut to the chase…I always wanted to be a girl! In the late 70’s and early 80’s you could just barely be alittle gay (un pocito). I always hid it…felt bad about myself whenever I could and coped……….So turns out Im an awesome giving, caring person and Im not doing anything wrong by wanting to be a girl. I dress openl in the greater boston area even though I do not pass as a girl. Ive decided that its time people understood that you can dress/be whoever ou want to be. my kids know…(its different for this generation). its just not a problem for them, the ALL have transgender friends. All my other relations, clients(im a personal trainer) and friends know. Just my wife and M.I.L are negative. Im giving them so time and respect to understand. I will slowly transition over the next fall/winter/spring for next summer. Im growing out my short hair, learning about hormones, working with a gender therapist and counting my blessings! I wish you all the luck, goodwill, and whatever in the future. please stay in touch. Peter or Naomi but probably Shelia!

    Liked by 1 person

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